Ohmygosh, this is one week that I won't forget anytime soon. I don't want to say that I want to wipe it off my calendar forever, there were some shinning moments, but there were also some very black moments. Let's see if I can recap...
Monday:
The week started out okay, nothing too exciting. I was a good day to get stuff done at work, my NASA boss had the day off because of the holiday, so I didn't have to deal with him. I did a major brain dump of all my knowledge of a program to my new backup and some newbies, oh and Sandy. I thought about it later that night and I was amazed by how much I really know. LOL, kind of funny to say since I've been doing it for 12.5 years.
Tuesday:
Had my marathon meeting at work about the new program, I enjoy them, but then again, they drain me. I ended my day with watching Lan, Jodie and Bryan had v-ball. Lan cracks me up--Bryan made Jodie a cake for her b-day and there were still candles on it, Lan made me light them 6 times so he could keep blowing them out. After that, we watched cartoons until his parents came home. Another successful night watching Lan!
Wednesday:
I started my day with dropping the dogs off at daycare--they were so excited. When I arrived, there was a 10mo old great dane girl, she was so cute and HUGE. Sammy and her took off and started playing with each other. I could have just stayed there all day!
I was on console that day, it was so-so. I'm so tired of console it is sad, I used to love going over to MCC, now I see it as a chore.
After work I went to pick up the dogs and headed home. And that is where my hell began... (I was going to recount the events, but I just can't, too difficult) the point of the story is that Brody bit the neighbor's dog and it was my & Brody's fault. The guilt was overwhelming, it still is.
I'm finding myself wanting to write about how I'm feeling and such, but I just can't. To be honest I really don't want the comments from others on it. I'm dealing with my family, the two things that are completely dependant on me and that are 100% loyal to me and love me unconditionally, something that I need desperately.
Thursday:
After a night of not sleeping, I dragged myself to work feeling horrible. But soon after arriving at work, I heard wonderful news... a close friend that has been wanting a kid for a while just found out she was preggers. I'm over the moon excited for her and I know she will be a great mom, she is always so good with all the kiddos.
I tried all day to keep it together, but I lost it at the end of the day, I had a full out, sob-fest in Carolyn's office. I honestly don't think I've cried that hard since my mom passed away. The thought of having to break up my 'family' and put Brody to sleep is overwhelming to me.
After I got home, I walked over to the neighbor's house to see how their dog was doing. He seems to be doing okay, which made me feel better, better enough to try to get some sleep that night.
Friday:
So glad the week was ending. Work was work, I got a lot done on IPV testing and made a list of the things that i needed to do for show on Saturday. Friday night I had dinner with some friends. Kevin & Bridget, John & Chrissy, Steve & Raquel and Tim--we all went to BJs and had a great time. Found out another friend of mine is peggers. The baby boom reminds me of the marriage boom of a few years ago--I guess that is the natural progression of life. Anywho, getting back to Friday dinner, I so needed that, i loved every moment of that dinner and just love those friends to death.
Saturday:
Woke up early, packed up the car and headed to do the charity art show. A co-worker of mine organized a breast cancer research show. I had some glass candle holders, glass pendants and some bracelets that Jodie help me put together. The show was small, but at the end of the day, The Komen foundation will receive ~$30 in proceeds from the sale of some items. I spent Saturday night watching some shows on the dvr and loving it.
Sunday:
Slept in late and then headed to the art show downtown. Ohmygosh did I need that. The weather was absolutely incredible today and I loved walking around the festival and taking in all the art. I freaking love art. LOVE IT. I love studying people's work, see what they do, the meaning behind it, everything. I hated going alone, but I guess that worked out best, cause I could go at my own pace and talk to the artists without bothering anyone else. I was at this one glass booth, and I was studying his work, and I saw that he had some incompatibly issues. His piece was for sale for $600, and all I could think of was the owner of that piece was going to be majorly pissed when it starts to fall. I really liked the fact that I can tell quality glass.
I ended the day with some doing some work outside in this awesome weather, and a dog walk.
Again, this week hads it ups with friends being preggers and lows with some family issues. There is so much more I want to write about, but I'm going to end it here and head to sleep. I have all these thoughts running thru my head, but I'm really finding it hard to express them all in words. And I want to share, I want to get them out, but just can't. good night.
Monday:
The week started out okay, nothing too exciting. I was a good day to get stuff done at work, my NASA boss had the day off because of the holiday, so I didn't have to deal with him. I did a major brain dump of all my knowledge of a program to my new backup and some newbies, oh and Sandy. I thought about it later that night and I was amazed by how much I really know. LOL, kind of funny to say since I've been doing it for 12.5 years.
Tuesday:
Had my marathon meeting at work about the new program, I enjoy them, but then again, they drain me. I ended my day with watching Lan, Jodie and Bryan had v-ball. Lan cracks me up--Bryan made Jodie a cake for her b-day and there were still candles on it, Lan made me light them 6 times so he could keep blowing them out. After that, we watched cartoons until his parents came home. Another successful night watching Lan!
Wednesday:
I started my day with dropping the dogs off at daycare--they were so excited. When I arrived, there was a 10mo old great dane girl, she was so cute and HUGE. Sammy and her took off and started playing with each other. I could have just stayed there all day!
I was on console that day, it was so-so. I'm so tired of console it is sad, I used to love going over to MCC, now I see it as a chore.
After work I went to pick up the dogs and headed home. And that is where my hell began... (I was going to recount the events, but I just can't, too difficult) the point of the story is that Brody bit the neighbor's dog and it was my & Brody's fault. The guilt was overwhelming, it still is.
I'm finding myself wanting to write about how I'm feeling and such, but I just can't. To be honest I really don't want the comments from others on it. I'm dealing with my family, the two things that are completely dependant on me and that are 100% loyal to me and love me unconditionally, something that I need desperately.
Thursday:
After a night of not sleeping, I dragged myself to work feeling horrible. But soon after arriving at work, I heard wonderful news... a close friend that has been wanting a kid for a while just found out she was preggers. I'm over the moon excited for her and I know she will be a great mom, she is always so good with all the kiddos.
I tried all day to keep it together, but I lost it at the end of the day, I had a full out, sob-fest in Carolyn's office. I honestly don't think I've cried that hard since my mom passed away. The thought of having to break up my 'family' and put Brody to sleep is overwhelming to me.
After I got home, I walked over to the neighbor's house to see how their dog was doing. He seems to be doing okay, which made me feel better, better enough to try to get some sleep that night.
Friday:
So glad the week was ending. Work was work, I got a lot done on IPV testing and made a list of the things that i needed to do for show on Saturday. Friday night I had dinner with some friends. Kevin & Bridget, John & Chrissy, Steve & Raquel and Tim--we all went to BJs and had a great time. Found out another friend of mine is peggers. The baby boom reminds me of the marriage boom of a few years ago--I guess that is the natural progression of life. Anywho, getting back to Friday dinner, I so needed that, i loved every moment of that dinner and just love those friends to death.
Saturday:
Woke up early, packed up the car and headed to do the charity art show. A co-worker of mine organized a breast cancer research show. I had some glass candle holders, glass pendants and some bracelets that Jodie help me put together. The show was small, but at the end of the day, The Komen foundation will receive ~$30 in proceeds from the sale of some items. I spent Saturday night watching some shows on the dvr and loving it.
Sunday:
Slept in late and then headed to the art show downtown. Ohmygosh did I need that. The weather was absolutely incredible today and I loved walking around the festival and taking in all the art. I freaking love art. LOVE IT. I love studying people's work, see what they do, the meaning behind it, everything. I hated going alone, but I guess that worked out best, cause I could go at my own pace and talk to the artists without bothering anyone else. I was at this one glass booth, and I was studying his work, and I saw that he had some incompatibly issues. His piece was for sale for $600, and all I could think of was the owner of that piece was going to be majorly pissed when it starts to fall. I really liked the fact that I can tell quality glass.
I ended the day with some doing some work outside in this awesome weather, and a dog walk.
Again, this week hads it ups with friends being preggers and lows with some family issues. There is so much more I want to write about, but I'm going to end it here and head to sleep. I have all these thoughts running thru my head, but I'm really finding it hard to express them all in words. And I want to share, I want to get them out, but just can't. good night.
October 20, 2008 at 8:47 PM
***HUUUUGGGG!!!*** Thinking about you!